S2E42: How to Find Love After Betrayal

Alia Jamal is The Love Coach and Pranic Healer. Once she felt broken into so many pieces, she decided to figure out how to put herself back together. She learned coaching and pranic healing to heal herself and her heart. Now, she is living her happiest life and helping others heal.

Social media and contact information: Facebook: Alia Jamal
IG: alia_thelovecoach
www.aliajamalcoaching.com

Podcast Transcript

[00:00:00] Damaged Parents: Welcome back to the Relatively Damaged Podcast by Damaged Parents where betrayed broken hearted, loving people come to learn. Maybe just, maybe we're all a little bit damaged. Someone once told me it's safe to assume 50% of the people I meet are struggling and feel wounded in some way.

I would venture to say it's closer to 100%. Every one of us is either currently struggling or has struggled with something that made us feel less than like we aren't good enough. We aren't capable. We are relatively damaged. And that's what we're here to talk about. In my ongoing investigation of the damaged self, I want to better understand how others view their own challenges.

Maybe it's not so much about the damage, maybe it's about our perception and how we deal with it. There is a deep commitment to becoming who you're meant to be. How do you do that? How do you find balance after a damaging experience? My hero is the damaged person. The one who faces seemingly insurmountable odds to come out on the other side, whole.

Those who stare directly into the face of adversity with unyielding persistence to discover their purpose. These are the people who inspire me to be more fully me. Not in spite of my trials, but because of them. Let's hear from another hero.

Today's topic includes sensitive material, which may not be appropriate for children. This podcast is provided for informational purposes only and is not intended as advice. The opinions expressed here were strictly those of the person who gave them.

Today, we're going to talk with Alia Jamal. She has many roles in her life, mother, sister, daughter, aunt, and more. We'll talk about how she had been suicidal and how she found health and healing. Let's talk

 Welcome back to Relatively Damaged by Damaged Parents today have we got a great, fantastic guests for you? We've got Alia Jamal here. She is the love coach and Pranic healer. She once felt like she was broken in so many pieces that she decided to figure out how to put herself back together. Then she learned.

Coaching and Pranic healing to heal herself and her heart. Now she's living her happiest life and helping others to heal Alia welcome to the show.

[00:02:23] Alia Jamal: Thank you. Thank you so much. Angela Such an honor to be here.

[00:02:27] Damaged Parents: Oh, I'm so glad too. But it was so funny is I was reading this and I had read it a few times before, but then I just kind of felt like Humpty Dumpty a little bit. Are do you familiar with that story that Humpty Dumpty story like, like that. So you've really felt just totally broken apart.

[00:02:46] Alia Jamal: Oh completely. A hundred percent million pieces had no idea how I'm going to put myself back together.

[00:02:53] Damaged Parents: Wow. And in those moments, I'm thinking like there wasn't even a glimmer of hope.

[00:02:59] Alia Jamal: No. I was actually thinking too, I was suicidal. I was holding onto some, pills and I put them aside in a drawer while I was cleaning thinking, maybe I'm going to need them. And that was a wake-up call at the same time, because I realized, oh, I have hit that low. So in that moment I googled therapy near me. And I got an appointment right on the spot because I was like, this is me at the end of everything.

So I went for a therapy the next day and my different journey started.

[00:03:30] Damaged Parents: Oh, wow. So it just was really because you use that as a wake up call. So you were aware enough to know, oh, this is not okay. Sometimes I think it's hard to be aware.

[00:03:41] Alia Jamal: It was because I had, I was a biology major, but I had two psychology classes in college. So I had enough information about human behavior that, you know, this is the lowest, when your mind is going that far, this is the lowest. And my son was 17 months at the time.

So I knew this is very low and you know, it's not acceptable. Something has to change

[00:04:07] Damaged Parents: Right. So you knew that, did you, in that moment know there was more though,

[00:04:12] Alia Jamal: In that moment. I just knew that I need to flush these pills. Maybe not a good idea, because I was like it was a moment where I didn't trust myself anymore I didn't trust, like the person who was living and there was this other force within me that was like, get help, get help. Right away.

[00:04:30] Damaged Parents: Wow. So you even had inside of you kind of a little bit of a battle going on, get help, get help, but no.

[00:04:39] Alia Jamal: Yeah. it was like, you know, just get rid of the pills. Like you won't even be tempted. And get help as soon as possible. And I think once I walked into that therapist office, I felt like world opened up a new path. I knew I have to walk that path and God knows how long it's going to be, but at least there was another option available.

[00:05:02] Damaged Parents: So was it hard to like making the appointments one thing, but walking into the therapist's office. That was that also hard.

[00:05:13] Alia Jamal: I got help. I had my sister sit outside the office with my 17 month old baby at that time. And it was just like, just go through this door. It was just like, that very pushy kind of feeling, just go, just don't stop. Just go. And once we started talking, then it was different because at that time I did not have insurance.

I think coming up with the money, I was not working. It was like a low moment in all different direction. So I kind of had to like sell some stuff to get money, to go for therapy. And that is where I, even till this day I look back and I was like, that was dumb right there. What I did. I didn't care about.

This is my last dime. My last dollar I invested and I got help and it saved me.

[00:05:57] Damaged Parents: Wow. Just that even have that faith to say, you know what, it's okay, I'm going to sell this stuff and I'm going to go.

[00:06:03] Alia Jamal: Yeah,

[00:06:04] Damaged Parents: And like, there's some sort of. I don't know, greater power at work in there. I

think

[00:06:09] Alia Jamal: It was, definitely something else was working through me because, the me that I knew myself was just completely lost. Completely lost.

[00:06:17] Damaged Parents: So today, like that is still part of you, but it's not, you. I think I said that right.

[00:06:25] Alia Jamal: Yeah. So I went through the, journey that I have went through. I healed that part of me that was so hurt. That was so broken. I heal that. I feel like there was this higher part of me that kept guiding me so we could heal that other part. And now they both live together in harmony. That's why I live such a happy life.

No one is broken inside of me. No one is hurting anymore. There's no more pain. We have both come together in alignment and build the life together.

[00:06:57] Damaged Parents: Wow. So you went from super lonely to now almost feeling like you've got your own best friend inside of you. It sounds like.

[00:07:05] Alia Jamal: Yeah. Yeah, for sure. I call it falling in love with yourself unconditionally.

[00:07:11] Damaged Parents: And when was the first time you felt like you could say, I have fallen in love with myself unconditionally. Can you tell us what happened?

[00:07:19] Alia Jamal: I can tell you till the date and the time

[00:07:24] Damaged Parents: That's awesome.

[00:07:25] Alia Jamal: That is the moment I became the love coach so it was September 1st, 2019. Around 7:30 AM. I had stepped out of my house to go get a breakfast, while they were like about 10 guests in my home. Everyone was sleeping, my son was sleeping and I was like, you know what?

Alia needs her time with herself. So I know the day's going to be busy. I'm going to go be alone, get breakfast. So I went to my favorite place. I got breakfast there and as I was eating and I'm like, Oh, my God, I have guests at home who were sleeping and I'm outside to give myself this alone time. Before the day start, I have really fallen in love with myself.

You know what? I'm going to be the love coach from today. And I went from, I went on Facebook. I created that post. It still pops up like, around every September and a light of that is the moment where I knew I am. So in love with myself

[00:08:22] Damaged Parents: oh, wow. I just love that. You actually remember the moment like that you took that time

to say I'm an important. And it's me. And you've just got this glow about you. I know the listeners can't see you, but the smile and the energy that I feel coming through the screen as we chit chat, is like, there's this peaceful.

It's not like, oh, I have to prove that I'm it's like, I just, I coach people on how to love themselves unconditionally. And I think that. In today's world, that's, difficult. What have been some of the challenges that, that you've seen people that come to you wanting to really love themselves?

What are the things they're kind of working against, I guess, is the best way to put it?

[00:09:11] Alia Jamal: So the first thing is like, there's this myth? You love yourself, you will be selfish.

So a lot of people did completely disregard the word self-love because they're so afraid they'll become selfish. So even when they start with me, they're like, you know what? I don't want it to be selfish, you know?

[00:09:30] Damaged Parents: Oh, it's like one of their first concerns.

[00:09:32] Alia Jamal: yeah. They're like, I want to learn to love myself, but I don't want to be selfish. So unfortunately, like, you know, some, somehow we, have created that with, if you would love yourself, you'll be selfish. And I just say like, you know, if you truly want to be self less than learn to love yourself. So you're not putting that expectation unconsciously on other people, which we do.

[00:09:54] Damaged Parents: When people are subconsciously putting that expectation on other people, how does that show up? Can you give us an example of what that might look like?

[00:10:01] Alia Jamal: It shows up very easily in our intimate relationship. Oh my husband, he doesn't do enough for me. or he doesn't love me. He doesn't even look at me. Doesn't care about me. You don't see any compliment to me. So it's like, you know, all these expectations is on another person. Oh, he didn't even get me the gifts that I really wanted while we never communicated that either or in France, it shows up like, you know, I was feeling down, no one checked on me.

In terms of our kids who would be like my kid is being so selfish. They don't even consider what mom is going through. I was sick and they still wanted food. It comes up in all different.

[00:10:43] Damaged Parents: I'm sorry, I'm chuckling. Only because I am also a mom and I have also had that feeling like even just last night, one of the kids came into the room and I'm, literally asleep and it's like, can you please come look at something? It's like, no, I can't. you know, like, but as a mom and I think that's actually a really good point that you're making, I think as parents sometimes instead of trusting that the kids will figure it out. We think we need to go fix it. And they figured it out. They did. I did not get up.

[00:11:19] Alia Jamal: I mean, to be honest, I feel like our kids are smarter than us in so many ways that we don't realize, and we just consider it's love if I give all of me to other people it's not. Subconsciously. We are expecting the other person to return it to us. That's why. unfortunately women, they would say, so proudly.

I'm such a giver I give to everybody. Or you know, that lady she's such a giver, like, you know, she takes care of everybody. I'm just sitting there in a corner listening and the lake, I wonder what kind of diseases she's holding on to, because we have so much energy. If I keep giving all my energy to everyone and I'm never replenishing it.

My body's going to start getting affected. So for us woman, first and foremost, our, you know, our GI tract system, it starts to get affected because it's right under our heart energy. So it's like, you're literally taking from you and you're giving to everyone else. That's not fair to us, but unconsciously, we were thinking someone else is going to come and replenish. No one can replenish my energy only I can.

[00:12:31] Damaged Parents: Yeah, because I think even when we expect, at least for me, when I expect someone else to replenish it, it's still not replenished enough. Like it's almost, I have to say no. To those things so that I can say, guess to me, but the funny thing is, if I don't say no, when I say yes to those things for other people, I start becoming resentful.

Like, did you have that experience or do you see that in people you work with? Like all of a sudden it's like, I'm resenting all these people that, but, I also have this complex that I need to be the hero. And then all of a sudden I'm the martyr.

[00:13:06] Alia Jamal: yeah. because we were, like ingrained from very little, aged. Oh, it's noble thing to give to others. It's noble thing. So we all are trying to be noble people and not a bad person. But some, we are somehow we've lost that. Yes. It's good to give to other people, but if you are energized, you can give more.

If you're barely dragging yourself through your feet, at some point, you're going to collapse. And that happens to so many people, especially like, you know, moms, our body gets more sick, I think, than anyone else, because we're just giving, giving, giving. And sometime we don't even have time to rest properly.

[00:13:45] Damaged Parents: Well, and I'm thinking the kids and the people around us probably can notice that energy we're talking about, like that energetic feeling. Like even if we've got the smile on, I think on some deeper level, maybe they'd notice that. you know, and then our kids, they take that from us and that's how they start behaving.

Like they started doing it to themselves and it just becomes this cycle of behavior.

[00:14:10] Alia Jamal: That is so true. That is so true. So many times when I have been near, I have done that when parents are going through some kind of struggle. even if there's some struggle going on in the relationship, there'll be like, oh my, kids are protected. They don't know they're gonna cry in the room, come out and put a smile and be like, oh, they do see a smiling mom.

But as human, we are very energetically aware And we do interact energetically. So that child is going to see a smiling mommy, but is also going to get impacted by that sad energy or depression, energy within us. And they're going to swim in that energy. So over time, what happened a couple of years and the child is feeling depressed all of a sudden. So then we're just like what happened. It was such a happy kid because, you know, whatever we were holding on inside, they did get affected by it. So it's very important for us to, especially when we become parents, because there are other little human or depending on us and what we carry inside of us to really nurture ourselves and heal ourselves and look after ourselves.

[00:15:18] Damaged Parents: And I think that, you know, there are age appropriate ways to have those conversations. Yeah. Mom's sad right now, or. Maybe when they're older, because it's certainly not their job to fix or even help us get fixed. Right. So how would you recommend if, someone is listening to this podcast and they're thinking, oh, I've been hiding this and they've got a five-year-old or a teenager just gives us maybe a couple of different examples of how they could have that conversation.

[00:15:47] Alia Jamal: So they can let their child know that, you know, this is what I'm feeling and, because mommy's going through something and I just need some time to cry.

And it's okay to cry. one thing my son learned at a very earlier age, because he has been with me through my journey. Now he's eight, that it's okay to cry and sometime he'll see me crying and he'll start crying and we'll just both talk together and I'll say, it's okay.

We can cry together. He knows that he has the permission to cry. He has permission to feel whatever he's feeling. He knows that if he's feeling uncomfortable, he can go in his room and I'm not going to come after him and try to like, ask him what's wrong tell me know we have this deep understanding.

I'm going to my rule. I need me time and I can be inside. I can deal with my emotions. I can sit with them. I can cry, but it's my responsibility. And then come out and then I can give my attention to the child instead of like pretending I process. And that's what also just like, you know, sit with them with that emotion process it, cry if you need to, let it out. And then usually when we cry it out, we can get to that smile naturally instead of forcing it on ourselves.

[00:17:01] Damaged Parents: Yeah. And I think there's a different feeling

[00:17:03] Alia Jamal: Yeah.

[00:17:05] Damaged Parents: when I smile and I'm like resentful

I don't know about you, but it's more like a grimace, like I'm making faces guys.

[00:17:17] Alia Jamal: Yeah. That's like trying to force us smile, but it's not really a smile, but I think if, you know, that's how kids get very emotionally intelligent too. The more we encourage encourage them to show their emotion by showing our emotion. This is what I'm going through. They can understand from a very young age, as long as we do remind them, it has nothing to do with you.

Mommy's going through something. This is what you know she's feeling

[00:17:44] Damaged Parents: And actually, I think that would be really important anyway, because if we don't then it's left up to the child's interpretation and then how does the child interpret that, oh, something's wrong with me. And then they grow up and become people-pleasers or whatever. Right. Because then everyone else's emotions or their job.

Wow.

[00:18:05] Alia Jamal: Yeah.

[00:18:06] Damaged Parents: Yeah. I hadn't thought about that before. I mean, I have thought about that, but it, I love it when it's like succinctly things come together in my mind, it's like, oh

[00:18:15] Alia Jamal: Thoughts are getting connected.

[00:18:16] Damaged Parents: Whether it's been realized before or not in this moment, it's beautiful. And I'm like, oh yeah, I forgot. You know, we forget. I think we forget. I do.

[00:18:25] Alia Jamal: That is so true. like, you know, if it's not part of your practice, every day. Big things are not happening. You're, living a very peaceful life right now. Sometime we forget, like, you know, how all this is connected.

[00:18:36] Damaged Parents: Yeah, we do. Now I have a question. What is pranic?

[00:18:42] Alia Jamal: So a pranic is from the word Pranam, which is life force. So I'm also a Pranic healer. it's basically working on your energy body, I think, similar to Reiki, but this is no done distantly I've wonderful healing, modality that I use with my clients. And I used on myself to really speed up my healing process for sure.

[00:19:03] Damaged Parents: So. It's not like Reiki, but it is

[00:19:07] Alia Jamal: so what we call it, it comes under the umbrella of energy medicine, energy healing. Reiki is a different discipline than a Pranic healing

[00:19:17] Damaged Parents: okay. So I'm trying to explain, please.

[00:19:21] Alia Jamal: Okay. I have never, you know, experienced Reiki myself, but what I do understand about Pranic healing, you can use it pretty much for anything in your life. Like anything at all. I am fully trained. I have done all eight levels, so I can do healing for any kind of emotional issues like phobia, anxiety, depression, stress, anger, all of that.

We can work on any kind of disease that the body's having. It could be as severe as cancer. It could be as mild as a migraine so we can work with all of that at the same time I can do weight loss healing. So within an hour you would lose, like four and just, even more on your, waist and then you'd be like, where did where did everything go

[00:20:08] Damaged Parents: And you've seen this happen.

[00:20:10] Alia Jamal: yeah.

On myself too. And you know, with my clients as well

And I can also do like facelifts. So if you have like wrinkles going on 10, 20 minutes of healing, your, wrinkles are gonna get very smoothen now out. we can do that. I can do healing on my life itself. I can clear my day energeticly and it's going to be one of the smoothest day.

I can do healing on my business itself. I was pushing out a workshop and I felt like, you know, something you just stuck. I'm like, okay, let me just clear the energy for my workshop. And then, you know, within a few hours, like people started signing up more. So that was, I think me, maybe I have put in some energy in there that was not in alignment.

I can also sometime clear entities from a space, if they are living rent free in someone's space. so we can do that too. So there's like so many implications of Pranic healing that I absolutely just love it.

[00:21:11] Damaged Parents: So it's like there's an energy field. Does someone have to be in your space in order for you to do this or.

[00:21:20] Alia Jamal: No, this is done. distantly. I usually prefer when I work with my clients, I do it in the evening time because it's best if they don't take a shower for like eight to 12 hours, because the energy needs to be absorbed by the physical body and water has its own energy. So you usually do it in evening time. If I can do it while you're sleeping, even better because our thoughts are energy.

And while we are awake, we are just thinking, thinking, thinking, and they start to like, you know, interfere with the energy that's coming to you to

[00:21:51] Damaged Parents: Wow. So if someone is sleeping and, they're in another place or a city, whatever, it's not, I mean, they're not going to go on zoom and fall asleep, right. Or so how does that work? You just know that that's what they, want. Or you guys have a conversation ahead of time

[00:22:09] Alia Jamal: No, we, have a consultation and some people they're like, no, I want to experience it live. I don't have anything going on. So then I'll just ask them, okay, lay down, just keep the zoom close to you. I'll play a calming music. They'll just go in a space of gratitude within themselves because gratitude and peace.

They're one of the highest vibration. It opens up the heart and they can receive better and I'll just do healing on them. And, you know, once we are done, they're like, oh my God, I have never felt this peaceful before. Some people who are more energy sensitive, they feel so expanded and very light. And then, you know, they will go on with their day.

I'll keep checking on them and I will keep checking on their energy. If it's, you know, still light or is it getting heavier based on what they're going through. I might do the second session or the third day if not needed, then.

I'll just repeat it after a week.

[00:23:01] Damaged Parents: Oh, wow. and they've had good results with, all of this.

[00:23:04] Alia Jamal: Oh, it's wonderful results. I think I can, I can talk forever how phenomenal results I have received, both emotionally physically. I have worked on people who are in ER, and they made it home. I have worked on people who the doctor said, okay, if this.

person makes it through the night, you'll be lucky.

There's nothing we can do. And I have done healing on that person. And after two days they were home.

[00:23:29] Damaged Parents: So this, because I know like I've done the, I've read the studies on the heart and the heart bring coherence and things like that. And I know that, emotional field from the heart extends, I think up to 10 feet, they were able to find out in a Faraday cage, but I think what I'm hearing from you is. That field is full of things that can also be healed. That seems somewhat irrational, right? Like, because we can't see it, so it must not be there because we can't see it.

[00:24:01] Alia Jamal: Yeah, but, you know, energetically, we all can feel it and we can physically feel it. So we hold all the past trauma in our back heart. So our heart energy field there's one in the front of a part in the front and a part in the back. So when I take on a client for coaching, I tell them at the end here, I'll be also offering a Pranic healing part of the package

so then, you know, some say, oh, I'm not sure that's magic. And then, you know, we part ways and some say like, oh, that is really cool. I'll take anything. I check their back heart chakra, back heart energy. And I'm like, oh, okay. They are holding onto a lot of stuff. There's this another chakra called mammon.

It's a closer to our lower back. I check that. And I'm like, oh, they're holding onto a lot of resentment. I know exactly where to go. So energetically, I get so much like, you know, feedback from their energy body that we are able to create. Massive results is such a short time. I have not had one client so far, that we had first session and just after first session, they didn't feel any better. By third session, they're just like, oh my God, I'm feeling so amazing. I'm like, just wait until your get to 12th session and how you're going to be feeling.

[00:25:22] Damaged Parents: Yeah,

[00:25:23] Alia Jamal: And I can offer like, you know, such a wonderful results for them because I'm breaking both on the physical and the energetical. And both are coming in alignment

[00:25:34] Damaged Parents: Right. So, so because of working on learning how to love themselves and then using the Pranic healing on in addition to that is helping clear the energy field so that then someone can get to that point of unconditional love for themselves.

[00:25:51] Alia Jamal: And, I teach a lot about energy flow that comes from our. It's not the emotion of love. Emotion of love comes with its own attachment. You know, it's good to have attachments too so energetically, we cleared the heart, usually I'm sure you would be familiar with it. Sometime when we go to trauma, we create, this thing called heart wall.

It's an energetical wall that we create around our heart. So we stay safe and we can keep moving through life. Even though there has been so much trauma. So through the inner work that we are doing in coaching the wall starts to get dissolved because they are shifting their understanding. They're building more trust.

They're releasing the guilt. They're understanding their trauma from a different perspective now. And while I keep doing healing on them, their heart starts to open up so much more that they literally feel an openness in their chest. So they start to connect with the energy of love in heart. And once the one with that energy, they're like, I was so in love with myself.

I don't know what changed, but I am so in love with myself. I like, we just cleared what was masking that love for you. That's all.

[00:27:05] Damaged Parents: It would seem like the challenges that would come up after that would just be different. Once someone has fallen back in love and opened up that heart space. And so now going through challenges, noticed different after that?

[00:27:21] Alia Jamal: So now I just feel like, the way I move through life, there's no challenge, like, a thing will happen and it will be like, oh,

okay. How can I grow through it what is life asking me to like, what direction I need to grow? It's not any more like oh my God, what I'm going to do now? Why things are going this way?

Everything is an opportunity because one very magical thing that happens once our heart opens up that way, it kind of trips up the mechanism of our lower brain and it, kind of activate our higher brain. So our higher brain is all the possibilities and the solutions are lower brain is where the fears and the insecurities are, so the more your heart would be open

the more you're going to look at life with possibility. So you know, someone else might think would be negative, that just happened in your life, but you would look at it, you'd be Like oh, how wonderful, how can I learn something from it, And how can they grow through it?

[00:28:18] Damaged Parents: Like you're looking at it instead as potential versus struggle. And this is something I have to fight against. It's maybe more like waves in an ocean where it's going with the wave instead of pushing against it because, you know, I can't win that battle with the wave anyway.

[00:28:38] Alia Jamal: That is so true. and, you know, I have seen such a positive impact of my own words and my own action on my son. The other day I was driving him and his friend from the school and they were talking about something and he goes, it's nobody's fault. No one is ever at fault. We all are just doing whatever we think is best.

I was like, Ooh, I like that perspective.

[00:29:02] Damaged Parents: Yeah, right.

[00:29:05] Alia Jamal: I'm so happy. He's stepping into the possibility because he keep hearing me saying those kinds of words, stick to the possibility instead of start pointing fingers and going into that victim role, like who do I need to prove that it's their fault? How about we just stay in a place it's nobody's fault.

[00:29:23] Damaged Parents: Yeah, well, and I think believing it too, I think our kids pick up on that as well. And I think if we believe it, then we don't have to sell it. It just is what we believe. if our kids can take that on, that's so much better.

[00:29:39] Alia Jamal: Your life would be so much different.

[00:29:42] Damaged Parents: I know my kids are teenagers and I think as I've figured this out, it's kind of funny because my oldest, I can't remember what, I don't know what she did. She was trying to make a decision about something. And, she was telling me how everybody had all these judgements. I said, well, did I do that?

Cause I was really curious. I was like, well, I'm really trying not to do that. Is she talking about me? And she's like, no, mom, you just told me to listen to my heart. You were the worst help ever.

[00:30:09] Alia Jamal: You just guided her to her own guiding system.

[00:30:13] Damaged Parents: Right. So coming from not being in touch and then shifting into that for teenagers, it's been so confusing. So I hope that you and I stay connected so that I can hear what happens with you when your son gets to that teen age and you, and what you say, you know, and how he responds. Like it's just, you know, cause I think also too, sometimes maybe we need to get lost. In order to find this, beautiful place.

[00:30:41] Alia Jamal: Like when I look back at my struggle, what I went through, I am so grateful. It happened the way it happened. The people who were involved there is no anger. There's no judgment. There's no criticism, no resentment, because I'm like, oh, thank God. Like, thanks to you. Here I am. I found me

[00:31:03] Damaged Parents: Ooo

[00:31:05] Alia Jamal: If I would not break into so many pieces. I mean

Thank you for being part of my path and being the catalyst that started all this. I truly feel grateful for that because in order to put myself back together, found the real me.

[00:31:20] Damaged Parents: Right, but you it's almost like you that was the way uh, there's a song I'm trying to remember. Um, The Wound is Where the Light Gets In is the song I'm thinking of. And it's almost like that was the path. Was that wound in that injury. And it couldn't have gone any other way, because that's how it

[00:31:38] Alia Jamal: so true. Yeah.

Yeah. So true. And you know ,now that I help other women, come to this place of love for themselves, but I'm doing this work. I literally have this feeling I was put on this earth, or I came to this earth just to do this work.

[00:31:56] Damaged Parents: Mmm

[00:31:57] Alia Jamal: And, you know, just being in that, like, it feels like I fit in to who I was supposed to be

[00:32:04] Damaged Parents: Yeah,

[00:32:05] Alia Jamal: I feel so joyful and it feels so peaceful.

[00:32:08] Damaged Parents: and like ease easy

[00:32:10] Alia Jamal: Yeah so much, so much ease there for sure.

[00:32:13] Damaged Parents: it wasn't that way before.

[00:32:15] Alia Jamal: No, I was working in my life and now might be like, I'm playing in my life.

[00:32:21] Damaged Parents: Wow. I love that I was working in my life and now I feel like I'm playing in my life. That's a great way to look at it. Like,

[00:32:29] Alia Jamal: Yeah.

[00:32:30] Damaged Parents: oh, if only we could all play every day.

[00:32:33] Alia Jamal: And, and, you know, like I had heard, I remember when I started listening to these, like, you know, Tony Robbins talk about it a lot, like do his lectures and whatnot. And it was like, oh, your life could be play. And I was like, what do you mean,

I have to put in eight hours every single day. And then I have to worry about my PTO in and that I was still in the beginning of my journey, but now on the other side, I'm like, oh, that's what they were talking about. You get to wake up every day and play there's no work in.

[00:33:04] Damaged Parents: Yeah, it's almost foreign. When we are talking about this, getting to a point where life can feel like play. And it's not for me. Like, I don't pick it, I call it picking up the rope. Like I don't pick up the rope and try to decide that I know what needs to happen. I mean, I totally do that. But there is like this, the sense of it's.

Okay. that I picked up the rope and now I just get to let it go and watch everybody else fall. If I'm playing tug of war, you know,

[00:33:32] Alia Jamal: Yeah.

[00:33:34] Damaged Parents: and again, that there's that play. So if there were someone listening today that they're like, oh my gosh, they are so full of crap right now. There's no way my life could be played. What are three tips or tools if they're thinking, But maybe I could do something and maybe, maybe I can get to where they're going. What are those three things that you would say, try try this.

[00:33:57] Alia Jamal: So the first thing I suggest is start spending time with yourself. Just alone time. Start with like one minute, two minute, five minute, 10 minute. Put up timer, just sit with yourself. No cell phone and just, just sit with yourself. Eyes open, no meditation, because there is a voice inside of all of us.

It's always talking to. But because we are so busy with dealing with our problem, we never listened to it. We never hear it. And as soon as you start listening to that voice within you, it's not always of guilt is just saying, Hey, hold my hand. And I'll guide you. That is the loving voice within you. I can assure you. I can promise you, are going to hear that voice

[00:34:41] Damaged Parents: And I'm thinking, even if you hear that voice, sometimes it won't make sense and that's okay. Listen

[00:34:47] Alia Jamal: And, you know, we all know that voice. It's so interesting. We all know that voice, but we, tend to ignore it. So that, voice that you've been ignore it, spend some time with it, that's the first thing you can do. And the second thing you can do is, you know, if you can meditate wonderful. If not go in a place of nature at least once a week, just be in nature by yourself because nature itself heals us.

It's the vibration that we came from. And, yes, right now you might be going through a lot of problems, but you know, handed over to the earth, stand on the ground and, you know, just let the earth absorb all that. So you can feel renewed. And the third, I will say definitely, commit to learning something new. You can start with the book.

You can start reading a book, listening a book, get on a YouTube videos. I have a YouTube channel. You can check that out too. there's this one book called, Four Agreement. It's a very famous book by,

[00:35:46] Damaged Parents: Miguel Ruiz

[00:35:47] Alia Jamal: yeah. You can always start with that book. All of his books are very easy to read, but they speak the truth.

They intrigue you. They're like, oh, there's another way of living in this world and commit to finding out that way for you and do not stop till you find that way. It might take you 10 years to find that you would commit to it. A few hours a day, few minutes a day, and it's going to definitely lead you to a beautiful place.

[00:36:14] Damaged Parents: I think so. I think so. Okay. You can find Alia, the love coach on Instagram, @Alia_theLoveCoach. And then she's also got her website, https://www.AliaJamalCoaching.com and you're on Facebook. And then you said you had a YouTube channel. Do they just find you the same way by your name?

[00:36:34] Alia Jamal: Yeah. So it just so a search on YouTube Alia Jamal I think I named the channel Heart Healing, something, something, and, I also do a free class every Thursday, 9:00 PM Eastern. you know, once they come to my, Facebook, they can see the information on my page and that's free for anyone to join.

And every week we have a new topic and we learn how to get closer to ourselves. Just a little bit more, just a little bit more every Thursday.

[00:37:04] Damaged Parents: That's so beautiful. Thank you so much, Alia for coming on the show,

[00:37:10] Alia Jamal: Thank you so much, Angela. it was a beautiful conversation today. Thank you.

[00:37:14] Damaged Parents: Thank you for listening to this week's episode of Relatively Damaged by Damaged Parents. We've really enjoyed talking to Alia about how she found a way to love herself. We especially liked when she shared her determination in sharing her love with the world to unite with other damaged people, connect with us on Instagram look for damaged parents. We'll be here next week still relatively damaged see you then